3. Practice, Practice, Practice!

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow; learn as if you were to live forever.”

— Mahatma Gandhi

A self-compassion practice takes time and dedication to develop.

Here are some resources that will help you get to know yourself.

Quiz 1

Kristin Neff suggests taking this test now and then again once you have incorporated a self-compassion practice into your life.

Has your level of self-compassion improved?

Quiz 2

Take this 5 Love Languages quiz by Gary Chapman.

It’s interesting to know your love language.

What’s more important to you: Words of affirmation? Acts of Service? Receiving Gifts? Quality Time? Physical Touch?

Incorporate what you discover into your self-compassion practice. Words of affirmation are important to me.

I discovered that giving myself words of affirmation gave me the same sense of love as when someone else said these words.

There is no need to wait for someone to comfort you, when you can provide that comfort to yourself.

A Self-Reflection Exercise

Kristin Neff suggests you ponder these questions:

How do you treat yourself when you run into challenges in your life?
Do you tend to ignore the fact you are suffering and focus exclusively on fixing the problem?
Do you stop to give yourself care and comfort?
If you feel you lack sufficient self compassion, check in with yourself - are you criticising yourself for this too? If so stop right there. Try to feel compassion for how difficult it is to be a human being in this extremely competitive society of ours.

Neff shares an interesting statement from a Buddhist teacher:

“Suffering comes from comparing our reality to our ideal state, and finding our reality lacking.”

Expressed as an equation.